Friendship and Leadership

Lessons in Leadership – David Stories #3

I Samuel 18:1-5; 20:1-42; II Samuel 1

 “…the soul of Jonathan was bound to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul…”

“…your love to me was wonderful, passing the love of women.”

(I Sam 18:1  and II Sam. 1:26)

What makes for great leadership?  Power?  Impervious?  Political clout?  Charisma? Money? Accolades from the masses?  How about friendship?  Can great leaders have friendship?

The friendship of David and Jonathan has carried all kinds of speculation.  It has been used to illustrate commitment and loyalty in friendship that runs deeper than bloodlines.  In more recent years with the religious and secular battles regarding homosexual relationships, their story has been used to tout gay relationships.  I believe that their relationship was more than “good buddies” or purely sexual. 

Scripture does not have many stories of friendship that covers so much writing space. (Read the long chapters listed that tells of their friendship.)  There are no other stories in scripture of such deep friendship based on a selfless love between two persons, (except a few verses regarding Jesus and the disciple whom he loved, which have held speculation that the disciple may have been John or Mary Magadelene).  There was something special the scripture writers wanted to convey in David and Jonathan’s friendship, something beyond the ordinary.  David’s lament at Jonathan’s death stating, “your love to me was wonderful, passing the love of women” carries much more than sexuality.  In the days of David, who had more than 3 wives, who lusted after women and committed murder to have the woman he desired, who more than likely related to women ‘only’ in a erotic way, wherein women were still relegated to “property” status, intimacy of spirit and soul would most likely be in relationship to another man.  David, anointed by Samuel, harpist for King Saul, slayer of giants, emerging military leader, was Jonathan’s friend,  an Anam Cara.  “Anam Cara” is what Celtic Spirituality calls a “soul friend”;  Anam, meaning “soul” and Cara, meaning “friend”.

John O’Donohue (1956-2008), writes of this in his book entitled, Anam Cara. O’Donohue states that the deepest calling of our soul is “the longing to belong. Belonging is a circle that embraces everything; if we reject it, we damage our nature. The word 'belonging' holds together the two fundamental aspects of life: Being and Longing, the longing of our Being and the being of our Longing.”  Anam Cara is that friendship with our own soul and/or with another, that enables us to discover that longing, that being, our true selves, our true home within.

Tony Cluckson’s definition of Anam Cara states that,  “an Anam Cara reminds you of what is important. They guide you to knowing who you are. They take you into what are called in Ireland “thin places.” They take you to the edge. They coax you to the edge. When you are trusting enough they push you. They know this is the only way for you to learn to fly. They know you are an eagle that was brought up in a society of chickens. The Anam Cara will take you soaring. The very air that will take you higher is learning trust and faith in your essential goodness.  An Anam Cara does not really care.  They know you are always held in the hand of the Beloved. They are not here to do anything for or to you. They are only there to facilitate your discovery that you are always enough. They know that what you need is not more of anything but a great big helping of “no thing.” This gives your soul true rest. This is where you give up trying to live life and become life abundant. You become the flow of the essential. Nothing matters because it all matters. Ultimately they take you to love of soul.”   (http://ezinearticles.com/?Anam-Cara)

Jay Alan Whitham and Wendy Lynn Nethersole, from the Anam Cara Foundation say that to experience life at the highest levels of fulfillment, we must first become our own "soul friend"; that intimate relationship with our own soul, our True and Authentic Self, that enables our capacity for "soul friendships" with others. Only from the place of "Authentic Self" can we discover and live our true life purpose. (http://anamcaraspirit.com/home.html)

David perhaps was the greatest leader and most famous of kings in all of Hebrew history because he knew himself and his own soul, was a friend to himself as he listened deeply in the times of struggle, hiding, running, and self examination. He was also open to the vulnerable listening with another who knew and shared in the depth of soul as well.  Exceptional leadership may well include the ability to “know oneself” fully and unashamedly and to “be known” and exposed to another.  In that way we are truly accountable to ourselves and to the world in which we live.

In these days of powerful leaders and information about all the “dirt” one can dig up on public persons in power, the tendency is to develop a defensive posture of protectionism, to hold one’s cards close to the chest, to keep private one’s inner thoughts and feelings and never expose themselves fully to another or even themselves.  Consider our US Presidents, both recent and past;  Barack Obama or George W. or H Bush, Bill Clinton. Or consider leaders within the systems in which we live; schools, workplaces, churches, community circles.  What makes one a “great” leader in the eyes of history?  I wonder who our leaders closest friends are and if any had or were an Anam Cara.  How vulnerable are their souls, their inner spirit, that very place where God resides?

We all know leaders who have led out of power seeking, or led in self-promotion, led by various fear motives, led without knowing their own heart and soul, led by forcing themselves to accomplish all that the external realities demand of them.  Those leaders tend to be followers of the trends of this world, finite, shallow.  Leaders who know their own soul, with all its holiness and human fraility lead in a different way.  Those who are soul friends value all of life as sacred and expose themselves to the infinite, what is mystery and lasts beyond today.  “Authenticity” may be a key. “Being” and “Longing” may be telling.

Lovers like to think their loved one is their “soul mate”.  More often than not what is meant is that they found someone who understands them, loves or likes the same things, shares a common view of life, and makes them feel secure.  While that is wonderful, it is not the same as Anam Cara. A soul friend does not protect us from the hard questions, from calling a spade and spade even when the spade is the self, nor refrains from pushing us over the edge when it is time to take flight.  A soul friend is one who knows and reads the deepest longing and being of that person, and does not let one avoid being who their soul calls them to be.    Sometimes we are our own soul friend.  Sometimes another person is soul friend to us.  Sometimes soul friends are mutual to one another, but never is soul friendship a common reality. To be Anam Cara to oneself or to have found an Anam Cara in another is a rare and precious gift. Rare, like David and Jonathan.

David and Jonathan’s souls were bound together, more than good friends, more than companions in war or in peace, more than brothers-in-law.  Their souls were bound to one another, known, pushed, affirmed, wept over, embraced, challenged, committed in life and beyond death.  This is a story of friendship that holy writers valued and exalted because it was extraordinary.  The holiness, perhaps, in this friendship of souls is what enables this story to become part of the sacred story.  David, the greatest king, has deep sensitivity toward his own soul, listening to soul force, the divine spark deep with the soul, and also had that soul friendship with another, Jonathan, which perhaps made him such an exceptional leader, flaws and all.

We know David as the famous political leader and the ancestor of Jesus.  The greatest thing about David perhaps was his ability to be true to himself, his soul, and his spirit, within relationship.  He was fully human, was able to know and be know, was vulnerable enough to recognize his weaknesses, his questions, fears, and mistakes, and to write poetry, confessions, and even sing about them, to weep and lament, to dance naked before God, to live fully and unashamedly always knowing his being and longing resided in God whether he succeeded of failed.  David was soul friend with himself, soul friend with Jonathan, and I believe, soul friend of God.

I wonder how things might be different in our world if more leaders had a soul friendship, with themselves or with another?  I wonder if we recognize, celebrate, hold dear those who come close to soul friendship?  I wonder how we might encourage one another as leaders and followers to open ourselves more to the depth of soul work?  O that we might have more Anam Cara people in this world and in our relationships.  And dare we think of ourselves as an Anam Cara? 

Thank you, to mine.

 
O Lord, my heart is not lifted up,
my eyes are not raised too high;
I do not occupy myself with things too great
and too marvelous for me.
But I have calmed and quieted my soul,
like a weaned child with its mother;
my soul is like a weaned child that is with me.
O people, hope in the Lord
from this time on and forevermore.  (Psalm 131)
 

 

 

 

 

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Unencumbered- Leadership Lessons from David

For Sunday, June 21, 2009

Unencumbered in Hard Times - Lesson from David - #2

I Samuel 17  (David’s Goliath)

Into every one’s life enters Goliath, those gigantic obstacles that would threaten life; challenge our dreams, values, and faith, diminish hope, or turn us away from the possibilities of fuller living.  We hit the wall, the Goliath wall, paralyzing life.  Fear sets in.  Those overcome by fear retreat and go no further, holding all their hopes in hidden remembrance as they go.  Leaders take on the harsh reality of the gigantic obstacles and seek a way to deal with them, get around them or remove them.  Leadership strategy can differ.  In the Hebrew scripture story of David and Goliath we read of 2 leadership strategies; one directed by brute strength and one directed by a spirit within.

You know the story.  There are lots of misperceptions around the story found in the first book of Samuel.  There is the notion of David being only a little boy and yet the earlier chapter speaks of David already known to be a “man of valor, a warrior, prudent in speech, and a man of good presence, and the Lord is with him” (I Sam. 16:18).  There is the notion that King Saul never met David, but already David has been his servant. We read of a worried father, Jesse, concerned for his sons in battle and so he sends the youngest, David, into the battle stage to check on them.  There is the squabbling of the older brothers telling David to go back home to the sheep.  All these spin around the story to make it one of the beloved David stories. 

This story, today, asks me questions about leadership. Does leadership come from an intimating, power-filled presence?  Goliath led the Philistines in battle against Israel because as their champion; he was intimidating in stature, in brute force.  Everyone, even those on his own side of the fight were afraid of him.  Goliath bred fear.  Difficult obstacles in life tend to do that.  All sorts of fears swirl around them.  Besides Goliath as a front man to instill fear, he was backed up by a whole entourage of strength, fearsome even without Goliath.  They came simply to impose themselves with power over and against their enemy.  Some big companies do that.  Some big business imposes brute strength against smaller business.  Big ideas diminish smaller thoughts and notions.  Established power is imposing.  Some call this good leadership having created such formidable force.

King Saul and Israel were sucked into responding according to the status quo.  Meet strength with more strength.  Take them on in the same fashion, with the same strategy.  Find some one courageous enough and strong enough to show more power.  King Saul, with all his own stature (I Sam. 10:23) did not take on Goliath.  He offered prizes for who ever would be courageous and strong enough to accomplish the task of defeat for him.  How often does leadership bribe others with prizes of notoriety in order to deal with the hard problems facing the group?  Rather than show humility, rather than converse and devise and plan of cooperation and group effort, we seek heroes who will do it for us single handedly.  Saul’s leadership of getting someone else to deal with the problem was a leadership based on fear, not based on faith or hope or possibilities.

When David offered himself to confront Goliath I imagine a sigh of relief from everyone that some “other” sacrificial person was offered up allowing them one more day of reprieve.  King Saul also, I imagine, was greatly relieved to avoid the embarrassment of no one willing to take on the taunts of Goliath.  Saul’s leadership continued to promote force of strength, giving way to status quo of how to fight the good, or bad fight, the ways of the world. Saul imposed his own plan onto David as to how David should lead. Put up your defenses.  Put on your protective gear.  Cover yourself.  Make sure you have all the weapons needed.  Saul so encumbered David with the defensive “stuff” to protect him that he could not move, perhaps not even breath much.  What a joke to even think of David suddenly burdened with another’s strategy of how to confront life’s obstacles.

In David we see an emerging leader who refused to be paralyzed by a huge obstacle.  We see a new leader who asks questions around the camp for information (17:23-27). We don’t see a bit of fear guiding his actions.  We only see his willingness to engage the tough situation with his own gifts and abilities.  He refuses to be sucked into doing things the conventional way because someone thinks it’s the only way.  Guided by his inner strength, the Spirit of God and his own spirit, his gifts, his past accomplishments and learning, and his passion, he offers himself as he is, unencumbered by all the stuff of fear and conventionality. He walks out boldly with no sense of fear nor failure in mind.  It seems David’s motivation is not the end prize for his own glory, but simply recognizing a gigantic problem facing all of the people in which he had gifts to offer.  David acted as servant to Saul, servant to his brothers, servant to his father, servant for the people of Israel, and servant of God.

Leadership is best when it is unencumbered servanthood, offering simply gifts given both in the past and present, in service of the whole.  Leadership has strength when it is not based on fear nor paralyzed by it, but acts on truth, inner truth, in behalf of greater truth, yet not limited by private truth.  Leadership is faithful when it does not give in to doing things in the usual way, but is willing to risk simplicity, vulnerability, and originality.

Remembering his past, remembering the lions and bears, early obstacles in the service of his sheep, David returned to his roots for his strength for this bigger problem.  Okay, perhaps in the defeat of Goliath David had to “beat his chest” a bit and likely found it hard not to get a “big head” when all the accolades came his way.  Emerging leader, yes.  Human, more so, even as we shall see as the story of leadership continues.

These questions aid reflection for leadership:  What kind of leadership do I offer when obstacles come my way?  How does fear shape leading or serving? How often do I wait for someone else to rescue me from the situation?  How quickly do I look for some defensive tools to protect me, or trust in some conventional schemes to deal with the gigantic task?  To what degree do I trust myself, my own gifts, and inner being to confront the problems presented in life?  Where is God in the midst of life’s difficult realities?  Do I act in conjunction with God’s Spirit within for my own benefit or am I in God’s service as well in the service of others through my action? 

 

O God,  may I and all your leaders be unencumbered by the external pressures of our lives and the many voices that were offer unhelpful advice. Listening to your Spirit within may each one offer servant-leadership as each one is led for the good of all.

 “I will give thanks to Yahweh with my whole heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds.  I will be glad and rejoice in you; I will sing praise to your name, O Most High”– a Psalm of David  (Psalm 9)

Spiritual Roots - Leadership Lessons from David

Lessons in Leadership #1

David’s Youth – Spiritual Roots

I Samuel 16

“Beloved,” that’s what the name, David, means in Hebrew.  David was beloved of his father, Jesse, beloved by the prophet, Samuel, beloved by his friend, Jonathan, beloved for a while by his king, Saul, beloved by his generation of Israelites and the generations that came after, because all believed that David was beloved of God in a special way.  Beloved David, most famous king of Israel, was and is regarded as the ancestor to beloved Jesus.

The David stories can offer some thoughts about leadership; not that David wrote the "how to" guide or had a leadership strategy that he followed.  Reading David’s story (I Samuel 16-II Kings 2:12) one can glean, speculate, wonder about many realities in leadership.  Lessons to be learned include spiritual roots, unencumbered perspective, friendship, responding to adversity, the establishment, human frailty and failure, family dynamics, lyrics of life.

David had the freedom of being the youngest.  His formative years were unencumbered by the first-born expectations.  The youngest son was often relegated to the least important task; for David it was tending the sheep.  As the youngest he probably tended the sheep longer than his older brothers who were each shortly replaced by the next in line.  As youngest, it may have been David’s lot to tend the sheep all his days, had not Samuel and God intervened.  Often in scripture the story line tells of the “norm” reversal of the younger and older, or insignificant or the “last becoming first” (i.e. Cain and Abel,  Ishmael and Isaac, Esau and Jacob, Leah and Rachel, Joseph and is 11 brothers.) 

David grew up free of living out other’s expectations of him.  He was free to develop what was important within himself.  He was self-taught and self-sufficient with an independent spirit that may come with being ignored or living alone wandering around in the wilds with the sheep.  Crossing paths with other shepherds, finding his way regarding other’s property, and respecting the ways of others who share common grazing and watering grounds helped develop his relational skill on his own terms.

Living under the stars, close to the earth and earth’s creatures must have been his theology school and obviously was a good one. (see Psalms 8, 19, 23, 24, 29 as a few examples of his Creation theology).  Living close to the earth was also bound to establish a trust in God, a companionship with God (Psalm 62), which resonates with all people of the earth.  (Consider Native American spirituality in relation to David’s songs.)

David sang.  Music, song, has been equated to praying twice.  David sang to his sheep, sang to the sky and stars, sang to God.  His poetry and his voice were his theological dissertation.  Singing new songs unto the Lord, offered prayer.  His “Credo,” his statement of belief, is clearly stated in Psalm 139.

David’s spiritual formation was rooted in residing within a creation infused by the presence of God AND David was attentive to it, trusting of it, responding to it.  I imagine when Samuel, the spokesman of God, anointed David without much explanation, his family in attendance, the ritual was powerful enough that the Spirit of the Lord not only came mightily upon David, but David also consciously accepted the Spirit.  This was not just an outside entity invading his life.  David, I want to believe, moved deeper into the Spirit led life, united with the Spirit, who was to direct him away from the fields and sheep he knew so well, into the wider arena of life filled with people, demands, challenges, and issues.  David’s spiritual roots would need to sustain him for the leadership required of him.

The Spirit of God which resided in David, offered a spirit of peace and comfort not only for David, for those who were in David's presence.  The God within David offered "presence" to a confused, angry, troubled King Saul, calming Saul's spirit.  Perhaps it was the music.  Perhaps it was the lyrics.  Perhaps it was skillful musicianship, one without annoying stumbles.  Perhaps it was his voice or his handsome appearance.  Perhaps it was God at work in all that was David, the Spirit in union with his spirit, that made a powerful emerging leader.

I wonder how conscious a later King David was to remember the days of his youth, remember from whence he had come.  I wonder if David had a daily ritual of remembering who he was, of singing, of prayer, of claiming his “belovedness”.  My guess is that the Spirit of God within him was alongside him such a way to call to his remembrance who he was, a recipient God’s grace.  Consider your spiritual roots today.    What are they?  To what degree have you disposed of them, kept them hidden or available, or returned to them for nurture even as Spirit has led in new ways?  Sometimes, going back to our roots, were they healthy to begin with, enables us to go forward in strength.

 A Mik’tam of David – Psalm 16

Protect me, O God, for in you I take refuge.

I say to Yahweh, “You are my Lord; I have no good apart from you.”…
Yahweh is my chose portion and my cup, You hold my lot…
My heart is glad, my soul rejoices, and my body rests secure…
You show me the path of life.  In your presence there is fullness of joy…
 
and from Psalm 139
…Where can I run from your spirit?....
            I come to the end – I am still with you…  

Power of Presence and Words

Samuel and the Word of the Lord

Lectionary for Sunday, June 14, 2009

Hebrew Scriptures:  I Samuel 15:34-16:13

The story of Samuel is an amazing one.  From his miraculous birth through the prayer of faith of his mother, Hannah, to a mid-night call, to serving Eli the priest at Shiloh, to becoming prophet of the Lord, anointing Saul as first king of Israel and anointing David as replacement to Saul, Samuel was a powerful figure during transitions years of Israel. (Read the first book of Samuel) After the Hebrew people made their exodus from Egypt, arrived in Canaan and made it their home, expelling those who lived there before, the Judges were the military leaders appointed by God to be the righteous and mighty forceful hand of God leading the people.  After the time of the Judges, the people of God began to settle into the ways of the world, desiring a leader like other nations, a king.  The voice of the Lord in the prophets like Samuel no longer held the popular vote.  And yet, even after they pushed and succeeded in getting their king, they still had great appreciation and fear, yes fear, of those who spoke the word of the Lord.  Samuel was one.  Kings respected him and were afraid of him.

I wonder about Samuel.  He is not one of the most outstanding figures remembered in scripture, and yet Saul and David both revered him.  Powerful kings, mighty military men, men who killed other men without much thought, were in awe of the presence, the words, and the actions of a man like Samuel;  Samuel, the boy prophet;  Samuel, the man who spoke God’s word for the people who were still becoming.

Reading the story of Samuel again, from the beginning when he came as a little boy to serve in the presence of the Lord, I am struck by Samuel who grew up in the presence of the Lord, who seemed to hear God speak not only in the night, but all along the way, leading and guiding him and the people.  I wonder about this Samuel who had the kind of ears that seemed to clearly be able to hear God speak not only to him but also in behalf of all the people.  Samuel seemed to have an “inside” connection with God, seemed to be partners with God.  Samuel had the courage to speak God’s word without too much fear of the consequences.  Yes, he did fear Saul’s anger when he set out to anoint a new king, but just before that we have Saul tugging on Samuel’s robe hem pleading for forgiveness.  Ordinary people as well as powerful kings made way for the prophet of God.  Somehow they knew there was something different, something rare about these people who knew God intimately.

And so I wonder about the power of “the cloth”.  When people dare to speak in God’s behalf, others listen, take notice, and are in awe, sometimes in fear.  In the scripture for today, people are afraid when Samuel shows up.  How many times when the minister arrives do people change their behavior, their language, or ask, “Why are you here?”  “Is there something we did wrong?”  People make way for those of “the cloth”, who wear the collar.  Some shy away from the clergy.  Some are afraid.  Some just don’t want to be anywhere near that “God talk”.

There is power in that presence, sometimes in a positive light, sometimes quite negative.  There is power in the action and the behavior of one who dares speak the word of the Lord.  People listen for their judgment, for acceptance or rejection, or turn away when the coast is clear.  Folks both avoid and are attracted to the things of God, the things of the Spirit, the Word of the Lord.

Who dares speak or act in behalf of God?

Samuel didn’t seem to question his call from God to be a spokes person.  He simply said, “here I am” and did as God commanded.  He did not argue much with God.  He obeyed the voice of God as he heard the voice.  Seems pretty simply and trusting.

Is today much different?  We have skeptics aplenty.  We are skeptics.  “Who am I that God would speak through me?”  “Who are you that you might have a word from God?”  We do not fear the word of the Lord so much today.  We don’t stand much in awe that God might actually speak to us, even if through another.  We mostly ignore any chance of listening for God’s word, and much less hearing God’s word, to obey it.

I wonder if we might be as simple minded (?) as King Saul to believe another might have a word from God for us and listen.  I wonder if we might be like David and simply receive the action of another’s blessing and anointing.  How much would we question, debate, discuss, discern, figure, analyze, question some more before believing or receiving the actions or words from God through another?

In this season of Pentecost, the season of the Spirit, I wonder how the Spirit continues to be poured out on God’s people.  I wonder who is anointed each day to speak and act in behalf of God to teach me, to lead me?  I wonder when I might be an anointed one in behalf of speaking for God to another, and if I am humble enough for the task.

“The Spirit came mightily upon David” (I Sam 16:13) after the action of Samuel.  To what degree do we have the power to empower one another with the Spirit of God? To what degree do we have the power to drain one another of hope and good will by turning away from one another?  Samuel’s presence, his words, his actions were a powerful force for King Saul, and King David.  Perhaps we are not like Samuel, but when we dare speak with a passion based on faith, best be careful, for the words, actions, and presence we bear impacts others with hope, courage, and/or despair.

I feel badly for Saul who was rejected.  Yes, he may not have been patient to wait for God’s word, but he seems to be regarded as a failure in the history of Israel.  I wonder if Samuel’s words of rejection were the cause of his depression and fits of rage.  I wonder if grace had been extended to Saul if he would have been a different man.  I wonder if we reject others, write them off as lost causes, if we might actually cause their “lostness”.  I wonder if we really know what kind of blessings or curses we might offer as people of God, mouth pieces of the Holy One?

O be careful little tongues what you say and do.  O be careful the powerful people who dare speak in behalf of God.  May grace, forgiveness, love, and peace guide all our words and acts.  May it be that the Spirit of God’s love and grace might come mightily upon all people everywhere.

O God, may you grant this desire of my heart, that all people everywhere may know your grace, your love, your hope, your peace, your presence, your rest, today and always.  (Psalm 20:4)

Hearing Voices

(late posting for Sunday, June 7, 2009)

Isaiah 6:1-8;  Psalm 29;  Romans 8:12-17; John 3:1-17

(Sermons to myself)

 

I hear voices.  Sometimes I think I am going crazy, which is pretty “normal” for most people who are conscious of the various internal dialogues taking place within one’s head.  I hear voices.  Lots of them.  Some of them have names.  Some of those voices I try to squelch.  Those only tend to try harder to be louder, to be heeded.  Some voices are patiently waiting to be noticed, needing encouragement; diminished are they by the loud and boisterous ones.  I have learned that the loud, demanding voices while heard easily, need to be disregarded more often.  The most beneficial voices are more often the soft or even silent voices that lay hidden beneath the raucous shouting of detractors.  Always there is the uncertainty as to which voices will not only be heard, but heeded.

The appointed scripture passages for this day are full of voices.  There is a familiar sound to these voices, like voices on the phone needing no introduction. We know the sound by heart.  I have heard them before.

Isaiah, the prophet and priest of God during the reign of some mighty kings of Judah, not only heard voices, he also saw visions.  The reading for today is the vision, with the voices, that describe “the call” of Isaiah to be a servant in God’s service.  Isaiah hears the voices of angel seraphs in flight, calling antiphonally to one another, declaring the holiness of God.  These voices are for all who have ears to hear.  These voices were so loud and powerful they shook the foundations of the huge temple, like a magnificent pipe organ shakes a whole church building. These voices were not to be ignored.

In typical fashion, these amazing voices are interrupted by Isaiah’s own internal voice, “Woe is me!  I am lost!”  I’m not worthy.  I am nobody to be part of this!  Get me out of here!  I-don’t-want-to-see-this-because-it-might-require-something-of-me.  The internal, detractor voice often attempts to avoid the awesomeness of what is.  From the internal vantage point, they can sound as loud and as earth shaking as the angel voices.

Then the seraph voice speaks directly to Isaiah as it cleanses Isaiah’s mouth of it response.  “Now this has touched your lips, your guilt has departed and your sin is blotted out.”  I wonder to what degree Isaiah was a guilty man needing forgiveness, or if his internal, self-prosecutor needed to be cleansed and blotted out.  I wonder if his inner voice was the guilty one, accuser of the innocent, which needed to be extinquished so that Isaiah was free to hear the more important voice of God.

Once the accuser voice is gone, Isaiah hears the voice of the Lord asking, “Whom shall I send?  Who will go for us?”  Only after his own internal voice of negativity was removed, was Isaiah able to hear God speak, God invite, God wonder.  Only after his inner voice was still enough could Isaiah engage in conversation with God and respond with his true self.  “Here I am; send me”.  Isaiah is no longer negating himself, nor is he filled with his own ego needs or demands upon himself or God.  Clarity of voices allows clarity in response.  Do with me as you will.

In the story of Nicodemus’ visit to Jesus there is a similar dialog, although the writer of the gospel turns this into a nighttime visitation rather than a daytime vision.  Nicodemus is a good man, a religious leader, open to listening for God even in unlikely places.  Unlike Isaiah’s internal voice blurting out guilt, Nicodemus’ voice offers confession of his true belief, that Jesus is from God, that God’s realm was evident in Jesus.  Jesus’ response, often taken to be telling Nicodemus where he is wrong and what he needs to do, could be heard instead as a voice of comfort and encouragement.  Perhaps Jesus response to Nicodemus was that he recognized Nicodemus could see God in him (Jesus) because he had already been “born from above”.

Then Nicodemus’ internal voice that messes up the truth spouts off and hooks onto debate rather than accepting Jesus’ simple recognition of Nicodemus’ closeness to understanding.  That unconvinced voice quickly responds, “How?!”  Jesus gently responds, his voice one of encouragement.  “Don’t be astonished”, this is no big deal, its like the wind, the spirit that moves and blows and cannot be pinned down, but is present.  The internal disbelieving voice won’t let it go and again spouts off, “How can these things be?”  Jesus voice again implies, ‘Come on, Nicodemus, you are intelligent, don’t give-in to this internal debate.  You are a leader and wise man, and this is not difficult.’

Two good men, noted men of scripture, battle the internal voices within; the voice of the holy and their own internal resisters posing as defenders but in reality are merely accusers, hoping the listeners will avoid God’s voice that calls one to risk being more.

When we allow that spirit, that breath of God, to engage life within us, we are then children of God, led by the Spirit as opposed to the flesh, the failty of this world. (Roms. 8:14)  Led by the Spirit and the voice of God we are not to fall back into slavery to the internal voices of our inner world or the voices in the world around us.  We are invited to pay attention to the voice of the holy one in and all around us, and to allow that voice to give voice to our own, crying out, “Abba!  Daddy!”  The Spirit of God in us speaks of our relationship, speaks of our closeness to God, speaks in our behalf.  I ask myself during those internal dialog sessions, who is this speaking?  Is this the voice of my inner accuser?  My ego voice? The voice that would diminish rather than open to grace? Is this the Spirit speaking? the voice of God?  Who will I heed and who will I block?  Open my ears clearly.  Open ear of my heart fully.

So many voices.  Pray for wisdom to discern, to listen, to heed.

 

Your voice, O God, shouting, thundering, full of power, awesome, and sometimes unnoticed, is everywhere.  It is over the water, in the heavens, among the trees, within your creatures, in the dawn and in the sunset, in the spring bird song and fragrant bloom of the earth, buzzing with sweetness.

Everywhere your voice declares, “Glory”, calling out to me.

Help me to hear.  Open my ears.  Shut out the voices that detract.  Let me hear clearly your song in me.  And hearing, may I like Isaiah, be a willing servant to heed your voice. Amen

(Psalm 29)